Tuesday, February 26, 2013


Most of you know that I've spent many years obsessing over critters.  My childhood was filled with animals and I've never really let go of that little girl.  Even now in NYC, I look for subway rats with Lu and am happy to see the occasional skunk or woodchuck that dares to venture out of Fort Tryon Park.

While Andrew and I were in Canada, I volunteered at the local animal shelter, mostly with their foster program, and found it to be an overwhelmingly meaningful experience.  If there is one piece of advice I can give newlyweds, whether they are thinking of having babies or not, it is to foster a litter of kittens or puppies.   I'm not kidding.   Andrew and I learned how each other handles stress, how to communicate quickly and efficiently (and nicely!) and how to jump onto the same page for the good of the whole. We were scared together and sad together and joyous together and there were these tiny little lives depending on us.  Andrew was also able to get used to all things foul smelling (compared to kitten diarrhea, baby poo is nothin').  I really think the experience was eye opening in all good ways.


That was a very long lead in to the real point of this post - Berry.

What a pretty pup, am I right?  If you've seen my facebook page, you know that I'm kind of on a mission to get Berry adopted.  He has been living at shelters almost his entire life (he's a little over 4 years old) and it's time for him to sleep in a home.  He is good with dogs, mild mannered, walks well on the leash ... WHY IS HE STILL HERE!?!  The only reason he is not at my house right now is that he's not a huge fan of cats (this may be a product of stress from the shelter environment) and so I think he'd scare Tank just a little ;)  I think he would be a great dog for an actor/artist, a couple or a family with older kids.   It's hard to explain just how stressful the shelter environment is on dogs and cats (even happy, homey shelters), but the fact that Berry has remained a mush through years of shelter to shelter life is a HUGE testament to his character and I think he will truly bloom when he has a family to call his :)

Some more pictures from my day at the shelter ...

 - shelter staff (and Flurry!) participate in weekly behavior meetings - cats - dogs - laundry, oh my! -

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Love! Love until the night collapses!

Look at this picture.  Oh my.  Believe it or not, this was wayyyyyy before Andrew and I started dating and wayyyyy before we really knew each other.  This picture was taken about a month after we'd first met, doing an educational theatre tour in New Jersey (romantic, no?).  I was seriously dating someone and he was casually dating many, but neither of us had plans for Valentine's Day that February night of '06, so we went out to a fancy Italian dinner with two of the other girls in the cast.  I laugh every time I see this picture because I really had no idea what I was foreshadowing here.  I was  just posing for a picture.  If you know me, you know I'm pretty fast and loose with the kissing, so a smooch on the cheek was my 'go-to' pose for VDay (if you look closely, I'm not even touching his cheek, THAT'S how little I knew him!)

Anyway,  I like to pretend that my heart knew we would end up together even though my brain didn't.  Seven years after this "kiss" I'd like to report that my brain and heart are in agreement.  

Due to many bad/sad/yucky relationships (and maybe because it's just a little bit the way I am) I've had to re-learn the whole love thing a few times (who hasn't).  What is the saying? One step forward -two steps back?  But I finally feel like, with Andrew, I'm getting the hang of it.  Becoming better at it.  Learning more and more that Love is enough (when "love" means: hard work, communication,  compassion, trust, compromise and, sometimes, space/time).

I am constantly battling toward these virtues, while Andrew seems to be standing at the finish line most times - patiently waiting for me to catch up.   What a good man/lover/Lua's daddy I have :)   

Speaking of the devil,  he just walked through the door after having been gone since before 9 this morning, so - I'm outta here!

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! 

p.s.  the title of this post is a beautiful Pablo Neruda quote - and here's another, just because I love him so...

 "I want to do with you what spring does with the cherry trees."


Saturday, February 9, 2013


Happy Weekend, everyone!

We're spending lots of time snuggling in (and jumping on) the bed this weekend. 

Monday, February 4, 2013


I constantly compare myself to others.  This is something that I have recently fully realized and it is a fact that I am mortified to share.

I was about to start writing something about how, "i used to be so self-assured...but now, wah wha," but that's really not the truth.  The truth is that I've always considered what everyone else was doing before I made my decision.  I was the girlfriend that cooked my eggs just like whomever I was dating.  Boo. Hiss.  I'm not sure where that comes from, but I've made the decisions:

2.) to try my hardest not to teach Lu that same bad habit.

Now, I should say that it's not like I'm sitting around all day looking at friends' facebook pages...of their babies and houses and lives and whining about why they all have houses and dogs and nice things and two kids already...  I'm not doing that.  Really.  Well maybe in my head.  ONCE.  Or twice.  And just because it was a REALLY nice house.

But I realize that so much energy is wasted being (let's face it) jealous of other peoples' lives.   And if you believe in Karma and putting good energy out there, or even if you believe in the Golden Rule, I am not doing myself ANY favors.

So, here I am, coming clean with the top 5 things Sophie compares.  I'm going to list them- for your enjoyment -and let them go.

5.  My body.  Rolling your eyes yet?  It's not so much the weight, it is the actual shape and elasticity of my post-baby bod.  I see mommies with no stretch marks and think horrible things.  Let's not even talk about my va jay jay.  I ask my girlfriends regularly how much sex they're having and just pray that their answer is a lower number than mine.

4.  My baby.  I never thought I would be a mom that comes home from playgroup all, "Lua is so much smarter than any of those kids!  She has more hair and is way funnier..." but sometimes - guilty. I don't think I'm the only mom who does this, right? 

3.  My apartment.  I think Andrew would list this as, "one of the things that annoys me the most about my wife".  Seriously.  We can't go to anyone's house without me bemoaning the fact that, "their apartment/house is so awesome!  I want matching things.  And cool things.  And rugs.  More rugs". 

2.  My success.  Unfortunately, I think I learned this from all the actors I hang around.  It's too easy to compare when some of your colleagues 'get the gig' and you don't.  When a dancer can touch her toes to the back of her head and you can't.  When someone goes from Broadway show to Broadway show and you are lucky to get a regional show here and there (or the other way around).  It doesn't exactly translate, but being a stay at home mom is a totally foreign concept to some folks and explaining to them that that's "all you do" get's really old, really fast.  People ask me all the time, "So, Sophie, what are you up to besides doing the mommy thing?"  And they are just asking to make conversation, to be polite, but it irks me.  I think maybe it's because this 'mommy thing' is more work than I thought.  Because I can't get it together to do much else right now.  And I look at other moms who are working or taking classes or baking a freaking cake and I'm a little embarrassed that I didn't get out of my sweatpants today, but instead opted to fore-go the shower in order to spend a few more minutes at the park.  Or reading Lu a book.  Or napping while she naps.  Ya, I do that now.

1.  My happiness.  Sometimes reading a blog sucks.  Facebook is no better.  If you let yourself, you can be convinced that the happy, shiny life that someone writes about online is all there is.  I'm a dedicated reader of one or two mommy/lifestyle blogs and, let me tell you, their lives are SHINY.   Beautiful people.  Happy kids.  Husbands who are Ryan Gosling incarnate.  Vacations.   All day.  Every day.  Yuck.  Obviously, I'm not silly enough to believe in the absolute truth of these internet lives, but I'm embarrassed to admit that they do get my goat from time to time.  The same admission applies to my real life friends and acquaintances who, for whatever reason, are always sooooo happy.  This said, I am a happy person (I swear)!  Just not all day, every day.  I have to be more realistic with myself - the people who claim to have a happy, shiny, perfect life every single day of the week are probably lying...or heavily medicated.

Ok!  That's it.  Officially letting this shit go.  It's that easy, right?

Aaaand here are some pictures of our life lately...because who doesn't like pictures?

We still think Lu's best trick is showing us her muscles.  She get's waaaay into it.
 Taking a toddler to a busy NYC bar is frowned upon.  Do we care? nope.

 Someone please remind me of this picture in 14 years, when Lua misses curfew or gets arrested.

 Fun on the Toys R Us ferriswheel!

 I had to put this in here.  Sometimes, as a swing actor, you get paid to watch movies and eat cake.  Other times, you have to go on stage with no real notice.  I'd say that's a fair trade.

 Such a good flyer.  She has slept almost every flight since she was teeny-tiny.

 Such a skinny child.  Belly.

 Too cute, even when she's ticked.

This one is from a while ago, but I just can't handle it.

Happy Monday!